I think engagements should be a happy and special time between a MATURE, DEDICATED, RESPONSIBLE couple, along with their family and friends. If two people really know each other, care about each other, are mature enough to take their vows seriously and really understand what they are committing to, are able to provide for themselves independently, and have had conversations about the future and their goals and they match up, or conversations with older, more mature couples and learned from and grown from them I think that engagement will be blessed and joyous.
With that said, even if you have been together for three or four years, why rush to get married?! Why get bitter and irritated that your 18 or 19 and you've been together for 3 years so why isn't he proposing? Why follow the crowd and be unoriginal and take a walk to east campus and pop the question? Why not be responsible and loving and wait until you are out of school, stable, and mature enough to actually be in a healthy marriage instead of being impatient, not financially stable, and immature and jump right into a marriage before you have actually had a chance to grow up?
I understand that I go to Bible college... and this is all normal. Well I happen to think normal is stupid. ESPECIALLY if your parents are going to continue to pay for your school if they already pay for it, or if you have to take out massive loans to pay for not only your school, but that of your spouse as well.
Yeah, waiting may suck. It may take time. But if you are confident you are going to get married WHAT IS THE STINKING RUSH?! You'll have the rest of your lives to spend together? Why not wait until you can start it out with probably a little less stress, more responsibility, and more maturity?
And to everyone who encourages this stupidity, and all the parents who give their blessing... USE YOUR BRAINS. This is probably not the best option for your loved ones and children. Who are pretty much still children! Don't just tell them what they want to hear, they are still too young to make that kind of radical commitment, TELL THEM THAT!
Yes, there are exceptions, and I am happy for those couples... but really... is getting married so young really necessary? Find out how you are as a person, what your goals are, and don't rush through the steps of life just because you go to a Bible College and "everybody's doing it." Remember the old saying, "Well if everybody jumped off a bridge and plummeted to their death would you too?" Maybe plummeting to death isn't in there... but still... just because the majority of the school is crazy doesn't mean you have to be too.
"For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife." -Mark 10:7
"For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and they will become one flesh." -Genesis 2:24
LEAVE FATHER AND MOTHER. Just because you're at school doesn't mean you have left your father and mother.
I just remembered something i heard at the end of last semester. It went something like this, "I'm here to become a minister, and to be a successful minister I have to be married, so I need to start looking for a wife." REALLY?! WHY ARE PEOPLE DUMB?! You can't go out and look for a husband or wife, they have to find you. People are dumb. And I want everyone at my school to read this, even though it would offend approximately 80-98% of the school. Why do I feel so outnumbered?
Wow, someone is jealous.
ReplyDeleteNo one will ever be stable enough, mature enough and ready enough to get married. The choice to get married is between the man, woman, family and God. You have no right to tell someone when they are allowed to get married, unless you are their parent. It is their choice not yours. And if someone wants to get married and they have their parents blessing, then so be it.
This blog seems hypocritical and pure envious because you are the one who is counting down peoples wedding dates. If you truly believe that people are to young to get married then why are you even encouraging people at the school.
I really think you need to stop worrying about others choices in life and concentrate on your life.
If I shouldn't worry about them, why are you worrying about me? And have enough courage to sign your name if you have an issue.
ReplyDeleteIf you absolutely must comment and critize someones blog, here are some things you should consider.
ReplyDelete1) Stehpanie is the furthest thing from envious... i think that is obvious
2)If you think that she is unstable and immature maybe you should tell her you think so and provide some sort of facts behind it otherwise your second statement is a ridiculous as your first.
3)I agree with you that the decision is between a man, woman and their families however: she has the right to speak her mind in her blog and if you dont like it then dont read it.
4) You mentioned the word hypocritcal, then you said stop worrying about other peoples lives... which in this comment you have made yourself to be the hypocritcal one.
5) And just because she doesnt agree with getting married, Does that mean she cant count down the days for someone to get married and be happy for them anyway?
6) I have single handedly torn apart your entire comment sentence by sentence. If you have any questions i will actually put my name.
Cody Allen Jones.
Have a great day and GOD BLESS.
I enjoyed reading it.
ReplyDeleteHonestly in my opinion, none of this screams envious.
Oh and I won't post my name, that's lame.
Wow. "No one will ever be stable enough, mature enough and ready enough to get married." This is entirely false and if you actually believe this statement, you obviously are not ready to be married. or even serious. You have to be..HAVE to be stable, mature and ready before you can even enter into a healthy, non-dependent(!) relationship with someone. much less a marriage. obviously you are young. I thought that same way. I thought i absolutely could not live without my boyfriend at one time...
ReplyDelete...then i grew up. and while it is very possible to be in love at a young age, its not wise. what about your dreams? your life goals? if your only goal is to get married then God bless. But, in a few years. When you wake up and realize life is HUGE and there is NO rush to get married, please remember these words: "I told ya so"
steph isnt envious. shes smart. done and done.